The real party is in my pants but you are invited to the one in my fucking sickbay for starters

[sharpestscalpel]

Got a message from 'Fleet command today, looking for Pike and what the hell is he doing and blah blah Empire business blah.

Uhura handled it before Chekov could flub it. Those two are turning into a dangerous pair. I've had three castrations to, well, it ain't like you can re-attach that shit when it's been pulverized. Chekov does some dirty fucking work, man. Good kid.

Other than that, ain't nothing going down. I figured we'd be seeing hell and weird shit after that whole scene in the brig but Enterprise has been quiet lately and Kirk is hanging on just as tight as he can to keeping his breathing and his beating fucking heart inside his fucking body.

Time to bust out some music, I think. Make the nurses dance a bit. It ain't easy to shake your fucking ass to Tom Waits but that ain't exactly my fucking problem, now is it?

Comments

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

...Spock?

Blank replies are illogical, you know. Unless the icon says something obvious like WTF or HI BILL.

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

I think the icon says she would like to see this post.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

So I was correct in my assumption? (http://sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com/5966.html?thread=281934#t281934)

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

You were. I just think Bill didn't expect it from a Spock.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Illogical, given that he understands my personal preferences.

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

I think he would have expected for you to say it straight out, rather than engaging in illogical internet behaviourisms.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Ah, then the faux-pas is my own. I shall note that this is only a social commonality, not a reliable convention.

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm all for you exploring avenues of human behaviour by engaging in it.

But as far as I've heard, nothing on the internet is ever truly reliable. Least of all social conventions.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Ah, my apologies. I had believed that a blank reply signified that the content of this particular thread was relevant to my interests and that you should continue this line of discussion, with my observation denoted.

Also, I would not object to a post, re: pretty girls tying each other up.

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

Oh, I see. Sorry, I failed to read the expression on the icon there. Len speaks better Vulcan than I do.

As it is, if both you and Len think this post would be a nice thing to see on your friendslists, I will just have to make it! Do Vulcans do, er, erotic photography?

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

I cannot speculate upon the recreation activities of approximately six billion individual people, Bill Shatner. However, if there are any who do, I am unaware of it.

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

Aren't you appreciative of the presence of humans in the universe, then?

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

I am appreciative of all life in the universe, though I do believe Romulans monopolize the pornography market in this era.

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

Seriously? From what I've seen around on LJ, they struck me as rather... uptight.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

They're dirty fuckers.

If they weren't such assface cocksuckers, I'd be plum fond.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

I assure you, their productions are quite...extensive.

It is often the most proper of cultures that exhibits the most interesting sexual behaviors. I have not yet gathered enough anthropological data on this subject to compose a proper anthropological study.

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry, I should have specified. Speculate, Mr Spock. :)

More specifically, then: do you yourself enjoy erotic photography, or are you merely curious?

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

I am always curious, Bill Shatner.

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

In which case, I will try and satisfy you.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

An appreciable sentiment.

Though we have not yet engaged in a meal together. Is that not a human social convention?

[len-not-spock.livejournal.com]

Oh, Bill.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

This would also be relevant to my goddamn interests.

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

Always happy to satisfy three people at once.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

Somehow, Billcakes, I am not surprised.

[canadianbill.livejournal.com]

And what's that supposed to mean, doctor?