I still want a fucking puppy

[sharpestscalpel]

Fuck me running sideways up a goddamn mountain, Scotty's new shit hits like a fucking freight train.

It's the 23rd goddamn century - why are we still using shitting freight trains as points of goddamn comparison for hangovers?

Goddamn.



I'm going to find myself a nice hypo of something that'll make everything pretty. You ain't supposed to treat your goddamn self but it's a fucking emergency.

Comments

[kirk-winona.livejournal.com]

Did you really just call me Tinker? Is that supposed to be some lame ass attempt at a joke about what I do, boy?

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

It's what you do, Tinker. You got a problem with what you do?

But I ain't your boy. You may be a mama, but you ain't my mama.

I'd still fuck you though.

[kirk-winona.livejournal.com]

No, actually I happen to love it. Just having you say Tinker makes it seem horrible.

I reserve the right to call you boy when I'm old enough to be your mother. Besides, how do I know if you don't get off on it?

I'd like to see you try.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

Tinker, that's a goddamn shame - I was being fucking nice. I could have fucking called you Hot Muffin or goddamn something like that.

You really want to know what gets me off?

You keep talking like that, I might be prone to fucking demonstrating.

[kirk-winona.livejournal.com]

If you called me Hot Muffin, I'd find a way to get my ass over there and show you just how much I hate that name. I'm not a baked good.

Why not? I'm curious what gets your sick ass off.

Like I said, I'd like to see you try.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

See, that's why I went with Tinker. Tinker. I like it.

There's a whole fucking list - I'm a many-goddamned-layered-lover.

You might just get the fucking chance.

[kirk-winona.livejournal.com]

I bet I can tinker with you and see how you tick.

Oh, so you're the baked good out of the two of us. Name one of your many layers.

I'm going to laugh when it doesn't work.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

We can fucking compare your mechanicals to my squishy innards? Sounds like goddamn Christmas.

Tinker, I ain't the type to put out on the first extensive comment exchange.

[kirk-winona.livejournal.com]

You are fucking sick. Mechanicals are so much better, less squishy.

I'm not either, Hot Cake.