Curiosity killed the fucking cat. Doing some goddamn memes brought it back.

[sharpestscalpel]

Or something to that fucking effect.

Little Peaches gave me some questions because some other fuckers were too pussy to do it.

1. Vhat are the most important lessons you've learned in life?

I believe I goddamn already posted this the other fucking day. Worth repeating though. If it's wet and sticky and not your own, don't touch it. There are some sub-lessons about proper glove handling procedures and inoculation on a regular basis for various blood-born pathogens and flesh-eating shit, but you want the short version, that's it.

2. Vhere is the furthest avay from home you hawe ewer been?

I get a little bit further from home every minute, Peaches.

3. Is there anything you hawe done vhich you regret?

There was this little rat-faced shit terrier that our neighbor had when I was growing up. I still regret not breaking that dog's fucking neck. I still have a scar from where that cunt-rag mutt bit me.

4. Vhat is the funniest joke you ewer heard?

I think it's a tie between:

Two baby seals walk into a club.

and

How do you make a dead baby float?

Two scoops of ice cream, milk, dead baby, blender.

5. Vhat has been the proudest moment of your life?

I'm a modest soul. You might could get me drunk enough to talk about it one day though. Feed some Romulan ale and then ask me about the time I almost got myself into some deep shit on the Romulan home world, okay?

Y'all want some goddamn questions, fucking say so, pussies.

Comments

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

Babylights, I'm not going to say you're predictable because that'd be selling you as short as that fucking skirt is.

But, you know.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

I didn't design the uniform, you know.

And you know nothing about me, nor how "predictable" I may or may not be.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

That's true. I don't think they actually asked any women before they designed them.

I got eyes, Babylights. I see things.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

They didn't.

Why don't you ask me some of your questions, and see if what you think you know about me turns out to be true?

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

Appears some things, when it comes to military-styled organizations, are constant across dimensions.

Okay, Babylights:

1. I know about the panties. But does the carpet match the drapes?
2. You still pining for the Spock what got himself bonded to your captain and CMO?
3. You ever been tied up and fucked over a table?
4. What's the correct percentage dosage to bodyweight for your favorite sleep aid hypo?
5. Who does your hair?

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

...

You're appalling. How do you know about Spock?

3. The biobed restraints are for professional use only, at least in my universe.
4. Luckily, I've always been able to fall asleep easily without needing a sedative.
5. I style my own hair. My mother used to be a hairdresser, and she taught me everything she knew.

[sharpestscalpel.livejournal.com]

So, check, check, check, miss, and check.

Not too shabby for just using my eyes. Imagine what I could do with a comprehensive exam.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm glad I'm not entirely predictable.

Hmm, too bad you're a universe away and a comprehensive exam is completely and utterly out of the question. Seriously, how can you see me?